Last Night’s Dream

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Dreams are notorious in their capacity to slip from waking memory. I’ve already detailed what I can remember of last night’s dream to husband, dad, and sister. In writing about it, I hope to cement it a bit more to my memory. Or maybe this recounting is pointless, and the dream will surrender to its keeping about as well as my hair would submit to the hold of Aqua Net hairspray. Which reminds me that I failed at 80’s Big Hair. No matter how much extra super hold hairspray I used, the volume on the crown of my head would collapse within 90 minutes.

Last night’s dream does hearken to the Big Hair era in some ways, even though no one had lofty hair in the dream. Within this dream, my family reunited to the place where we lived during a time when perms were almost mandatory. Back then, we lived in a large second story apartment that had once been a convent. The apartment was situated on the grounds of a Catholic church where my dad worked as a maintenance man/groundskeeper. The first floor of the building housed a massive boiler, so at the time I hoped that we’d never get snowed in long enough for any of us to go the way of Jack Torrance/Nicholson in The Shining.

In the dream, we were planning to meet at the apartment for reasons unknown to my rational mind. I just knew I had to get there. Since I know next to nothing of the principles of architecture, my dream buildings have only minimal fidelity to reality. Schools and churches morph into malls or airports. The homes of my memory fuse into homes of people we once knew. In this dream, our church apartment was stuck to one of the school buildings, and part of an amusement park split the parking lot.

I had to walk through the basement of the grade school building to get to the apartment. On the way, I passed several children who had stock-photo perfection, with clear skin and perfect smiles. One of the girls asked who I was and seemed completely enthralled to meet someone who once lived at her school. I also encountered my sixth-grade teacher who lost several toes in a mowing accident and in real life left teaching to┬ádevote herself full-time to her local chain of donut/pizza shops named after herself (the shops are still popular, by the way). How anyone possibly has the time to teach full-time and oversee four restaurants is beyond me. It’s not like she did this all by herself, but I still wonder how her days ever ended. Now she’s retired, sold the restaurants, and she still makes time to appear in her former students’ dreams. Catholic school was full of people who accomplished impossible levels of multi-tasking.

So there I was talking to my teacher-who-never-slept, and I noticed that she was a perfected version of herself. Her Carol-Brady-minus-the-bottom-layer hairdo had stunning highlights, and her face had that wrinkle-free Snapchat glow. She told me, “When your daughter was in my third-grade class, I already knew she had autism, but it wasn’t my place to speak those words.”

What? I don’t think she ever taught third grade. My daughter never went to that school. Such are the mysteries of dreams.

Then I had to rush to the apartment to meet my family. I could see that security gates were descending from the ceiling in the school(another feature which doesn’t correspond to reality), and I started running to get through the building before I was trapped overnight.

I reached the apartment and met my mom and brother. I didn’t consider where my dad and sister might be. What the point of this meeting? To see each other in the apartment once more?

When I turned to leave, I noticed that the old front door had appeared. For whatever reason, we had to walk through the school to enter the apartment, but we could leave as we did in real life. I tried opening the door and walking down the metal steps to the parking lot, but I was terrified by two things in the parking lot, a roller coaster track and a massive water tower. Like many people, I am somewhat afraid of heights, but my bass-ackwards acrophobia makes me more afraid to look up at something high than to look down from a height. The sight of that water tower had the proverbial train wreck quality to it. It was taller than any water tower had the right to be (tall enough that there was a foggy haze between it and the ground) and it had five massive bulbs to store water, one in the center and four others arranged like points on a compass. The metal arms holding the four outside tanks looked too small to hold their weight. I walked back into the apartment, afraid that one of the massive water tanks would crash to the ground.

So then I did something absurd. My brother told me that there was a vague threat of a terrorist attack and that there might be an airlift to evacuate the wary. So I went out to the balcony where we used to keep a container garden, and I didn’t have to wait long for a helicopter to retrieve me. The inside of the helicopter was silent as an elevator and turbulence free. I looked down once I knew we were well past the water tower of doom, and I felt peace as I saw massive highways recede into the distance. The highways near Lima aren’t massive in reality.

And that is what I remember of the dream.