I have dreamed of my mom several times since her passing, and the experience has been a great privilege. One of the best gifts Mom gave me was the capacity to accept dreams on their own terms and to be open to the possibility that they can mean more than the random output of the sleeping brain.
Some of the dreams have happened right after I’ve fallen asleep and seemed more like messages. She told me that I am loved more than I know. She also told me that I know some people who suffer (to use the same phrase) more than I know. The example she gave me of someone I know who suffers privately was so vivid that I actually asked the person involved, who told me, “Yes, it is awful for me. If only you knew.”
The most intense dream was on the subject of suffering. The aforementioned message was a prelude to a longer dream where I found Mom in a hospital, where she was a “den mother” of sorts to a group of a dozen nurses who were caring for Covid patients. Their shifts were so long that they had camp beds set up in a large room at the hospital. My mom was sitting in a high-backed chair with our dog Maggie, who passed away many years ago.
It didn’t take me long to notice that the nurses had something important in common with Mom and Maggie. They had also passed away and were helping to support the Covid patients spiritually. Mom’s favorite was a young, male nurse who knew just the right time to sit with a patient who was in distress.
Last night I had a dream that was absurd but noteworthy. Someone I haven’t seen in years visited with a black and white dog, and I suddenly had the sense that the dog was possessed. It had a distorted UPC-like marking on one of its shoulders that somehow indicated possession to me. I went to my room to pace around and do some problem solving on the matter, and Mom emerged from my closet. I told her, “We need to perform an exorcism on this dog before it goes ballistic and someone kills it and the evil spirit enters a person.”
She quietly replied, “I can’t. I’m expecting.”
I walked away, worried most about what a pregnancy could do to Mom, as if she were still alive, 71 years old with late stage congestive heart failure and pregnant!
This is not the first time I’ve had a dream where a woman I’ve known who’s passed away is alive again and pregnant. The first time I had such a dream, the woman I knew gave birth to her infant self.
Have you had any dreams of loved ones you lost?