The above picture offers the sunnier side of my state of mind over the past fortnight. Although I am anticipating fall and all of its cozy and colorful diversions, I have encountered a difficulty, or curve in the road, if you will.
Until a couple weeks ago, my recovery from back surgery had been progressing well. At that point, I developed pains that are equally novel and aggravating to me. I have radiating pain in my left hip and thigh that is not constant but almost unbearably loud at times (if pain can be considered to have a volume of sorts). It’s a good thing that I am not fond of shopping, for it seems worst when I do the slow walking that is typical of that activity.
By the time I am standing at the register, I feel a pain that is par with active labor, but I can keep a stone-like expression on my face. I haven’t exhausted myself so thoroughly with insincerity since my teenage years when I pretended (unconvincingly) that I hadn’t been drinking.
I’ve called my spine doctor’s office twice since this started. The first time their response was to put me back on gabapentin. I was game for this strategy because I figure that the slight forgetfulness it induces could be helpful. Why would I want to remember this misery in vivid detail?
I called again today asking for something other than a prescription. I fear that if I don’t change the direction of my conversations with this office that I will embark on a path that meanders through various drug remedies that end in a heavy daily dose of haldol or thorazine to shut me up.
My doctor’s assistant told me that the doctor may schedule an MRI to investigate this new pain. I will hear tomorrow if this is going to happen.
In the meantime, I’ve somehow been keeping up with work and home. I’ve tried to stuff my time with as many distractions as my energy will allow.
I’ve made a couple slideshow videos that contain some of my photos of past leaf seasons.
Even with this pain, I am still excited to see the leaves shed their chlorophyll and show their natural colors:
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